The bubbling breeze

Bobb, Barbara, Ian, Will, Nancy, Bill, Lynne, Edgar, Jim, Jeanette, Steve L, Bob

The Diner Diarist is back from the land where the nearest thing to a diner is the sort of low-grade cafe known evocatively - and accurately - as a greasy spoon. So it was a relief to return to the Conrads embrace and a bigger turnout than some of us expected on Memorial Day. You'd think we didn't have homes to go to.
It was an unusual evening, in that there were few major conversational topics, give or take the regular political analysis from Bob and Steve's end of the table, but a record number of entries for Caught on the Breeze.
I tried to explain that the LA Times hasn't really captured the full implication of the House of Commons expenses scandal, which could bring down the government and replace it with a cabinet of showbiz celebrities - anyone, really, who hasn't been caught with their fingers in the till. Anarchy is closer than most Americans appreciate. But, in true Brit style, it could all fizzle out and the LA Times will be justified for taking a laidback attitude. Gordon Brown hopes so, anyway.
Will reluctantly celebrated his birthday which, as many of us have come to realize, is an extremely movable feast. But Nancy saw to it that a candle-topped cake was produced by Javier with due ceremony.
But this week the stage belongs to the one-liners:

CAUGHT ON THE BREEZE
What do you call an Italian suppository? An innuendo.
Nancy said it was the third best show we had done. Thanks, Nancy.
It's strain F for 'I have the flu'
Alec Guinness: isn't he the nice guy with the forelock?
I find Dickens really quite frightening
They said 'Let's sing happy birthday' and I said 'What key?'
You've been liberated, Bobb!
I like it up this end of the table, I really do
Beverly Hills people keep their valets in the Valley
I can't wait to die - every day. And I hate Waiting for Godot
This so-called afterlife had better be good, or else
Give me anything with Bugs Bunny in it.
She looked great, when the light went down
This is a restaurant, after all
Does your mother put your tacos in the blender? So swallow your pills!
Ass me another